Invitations should be ordered well in advance so you can send them out six weeks before the day (you can send save-the-date cards up to six months in advance if you like). They should be in the name of the bride's parents or whoever is hosting the wedding. The exact wording of them depends on who that is.
If the bride's parents are acting as hosts: Mr and Mrs John Sinclair request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter, Caroline, to Mr David Smith at St Paul's Church, Ewell, on Saturday 15th September 2005 at 3 o'clock and afterwards at Trumble Hall, Lymington, Hampshire. Have the RSVP address printed in the bottom left-hand corner of the invitation.
If the bride's parents are divorced and her mother has remarried: Mr John Sinclair and Mrs Patrick Cook...
If the bride's parents are divorced but her mother hasn't remarried: Mr John Sinclair and Mrs Barbara Sinclair...
If the bride's mother has remarried and is hosting the wedding with the bride's stepfather: Mr and Mrs Patrick Cook request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of her daughter Caroline. The bride's surname can be added if you think that would be helpful.
The names of guests should be handwritten in full in the top left-hand corner of the invitation: Mr and Mrs John Smith. Or, for a family: Mr and Mrs John Smith, Robert and Susan. If you would like your guests to wear evening dress, have Black Tie printed in the bottom right-hand corner.
Traditionally, guests used to contact the bride's mother to find out if there was a gift list. Many brides now find it practical to include a slip of paper with the invitation saying, A gift list has been placed at..., with a contact number.
The conventional way to tell the world your news is to put a formal announcement in a local or national newspaper. Don't get carried away though - you pay by the word!
A typical announcement would read:
Forthcoming Marriages
Mr T Edmondson and Miss E Smith
The engagement is announced between Thomas, elder son of Mr and Mrs MJ Edmondson of Huddington, Worcestershire and Emma Juliet, only daughter of Mr and Mrs LB Smith, of Swanley, Kent.